The “wow xkin is so great” posts on the #otherkin and related tags are annoying. And condescending. And just fucking insulting.
I’ve seen more posts and heard more about things like barking, growling, howling, etc. in public.
For me, although I may...
I’ll be honest. I thought a lot, and I mean a lot, about...
trying to find nice things for friends in the otherkin tag is impossible people just want more drama? i want people to talk about...
It seems there were a couple of problems with account creation on AnOtherWiki. While you could sign up using the login/create account link in the upper right, the link to create an account under the Help:Registration page did not work properly. This has now been corrected.
Further, it appears that I set up the DNSBLs that AnOtherWiki uses to be a bit too strict. As a result, some Comcast users were incorrectly being blocked due to their presence on the Policy Block List of spamhaus.org. I have now stopped using zen.spamhaus.org, which incorporates the Policy Block List, and am using the Spam Block List and Exploit Block List individually. Other users besides Comcast may have been affected, it was just reported by someone using Comcast. If you tried signing up before and were told you were using an open proxy when you weren’t, try again. If you’re still having trouble, send me an email (jarandhel at gmail dot com) with your IP address and I’ll look into it.
Finally, I’ve changed the captcha questions to try to make things a little easier for folks new to the community. If you’re still having trouble with them, or would like to suggest additional general-knowledge otherkin questions that could be used as captchas, please email me at the address above.
AnOtherWiki was started on March 21, 2012. As of 11:00pm EST, December 24, 2012 it now hosts 300 articles about otherkin, therians, vampires and related communities. That’s an average of 1.075 new articles every day. This is an amazing milestone, and I’d like to thank everyone who has helped to make it possible.
AnOtherWiki also hosts what I believe is the most complete and up-to-date listing of upcoming events for otherkin, therians, and vampires anywhere in our communities - though I’m always looking for new ones to add.
I’ve also been making a concerted effort to expand AnOtherWiki’s listing of resources within these communities, and jargon used by our communities. These are ongoing efforts, and will likely take quite a while to complete.
Many of these articles are also still quite sparse. There’s a lot of work to be done to flesh them out, and a vast number of articles still to be added on a wide variety of subjects. So I’m putting out another request for help: Join AnOtherWiki as editors, and help us continue to grow.
Share with us your websites, forums, chats. Your gathers, minigathers, and meetups. Share with us your knowledge of the community, its terms, and the people who make it up.
As I’ve said before: This is our encyclopedia, written for our community by our community and about our community. All it costs us is a bit of time and effort, and the reward is quite worth it. So let’s work together to make it everything it can be.
Meetup Reminder - Saturday, December 8th at 6pm at the Lost Dog Cafe here in Merrifield, VA:https://plus.google.com/106024800889702113944/about?gl=us&hl=en
Well, two of the folks who were supposed to show ended up not making it, but we had a last-minute addition that more than made up for their absence, and totally made being on tumblr worthwhile. I’m not going to single her out unless she wants to identify herself, but you know who you are and you’re awesome. :)
a) It’s the general consensus of the real vampire community that someone who is not a vampire cannot be turned into one.
b) Why would you want to be turned into a vampire? You realize, don’t you, that real vampires are not like those depicted in fiction, on tv, or in the movies? A real vampire is an ordinary human being who needs blood or energy in order to sustain themselves. When they don’t get that blood or energy, the physical symptoms are actually very similar to a diabetic with low blood sugar - they get weak, they’re not able to think as clearly, they get more emotional, they get more susceptible to illness, etc. There’s really no upside to this. If you wouldn’t go out and ask how you can be turned into a diabetic, you probably shouldn’t be asking how you can be turned into a vampire either.
Let’s clear up a few misconceptions about crisis counselors, psychiatrists and psychologists.
Sure there are some who are closed minded jerks, but the law prevents them from committing anyone to involuntary confinement unless they present an immediate threat to themselves or others. If you bluntly tell them that you are suicidal or planning to kill someone else, they can and will commit you because that is the law. If you tell them that you wish you would just disappear or that you hate your ex boyfriend and wish a truck would smash them, they might be suspicious and recommend therapy or medication strongly.
The difference between sanity and insanity, functional or dysfunctional may seem murky, but here is how a woman with a PhD in psychology who worked for the National Institute of Mental health explained it (paraphrased) when I told her I had dreams that came true and saw ghosts.
“Do you expect others to see ghosts? You are aware that culturally you are expected not to mention it to strangers in casual conversation, but that in other cultures it is acceptable to do so, right? Then you are sane, whatever your spiritual beliefs and mystical experiences are. If you told me that there was a giant pink teddybear on the ceiling of your house ordering you to hurt me and expected me to see and interact with it too, then you would be dangerously insane by the legal definition.”
After we talked for a while and she was supportive, fascinated and open minded, I dropped the Otherkin bomb. It was a huge risk and I knew it, but the study I was doing at NIMH on depression in families had always given me great experiences. So I said it. She asked for a definition and clarification of Otherkin and I gave it. She was fascinated, commenting that it seemed that a new subcultural spirituality was evolving under her nose. She wished that she had government funding to interview Otherkin and start a research program to measure WILLING and volunteering Otherkin for mental and physical differences. She mourned when I told her that so many Otherkin feared mental health professionals, and said that those Otherkin who did seek therapy should seek those who worked with alternative lifestyles and open belief systems. She remarked how very alone Otherkin must feel as well.
Sure, some of you will say, she was the exception and not the rule. However a whole school of therapy and psychology exists that believes in helping people understand themselves via reflection and not behavior change. This is the Humanistic therapy model and that and the Jungian therapists are most likely to be open minded towards us.
With this in mind, also remember that a lot of Otherkin have mental health issues. I have fought depression for years till I found the right combo of therapy and medicine that worked. Once I did, I functioned. I still have frustrating days like anyone else, of course, but that’s life. What is gone and good riddance is that terrible bleakness of depression and the sadistic urge to make others around me share my misery by being cruel to them and dragging them down. I have a decent life and accept that therapy and medication are part of maintaining that.
I suspect that for some people out there, they feel that being or suspecting they are mentally ill makes them “Special” due to suffering more than others or having a unique perspective. Maybe they fear that their Otherkin nature will be cured by therapy and that they will no longer be special. That’s a load of crap. My art has gotten better since I went into treatment due to a positive attitude, better concentration, optimism and the ability to look at my work and see and know its worth. If you are Otherkin it is in your soul, not your serotonin and other neurochemicals. Suffering does not make you any better than other people, even if you enter into it for spiritual or political reasons. It just makes your approach different but the approaches of others are still valuable and legitimate. Mental health interventions should make you more of who you are, not less.
As a patient you have the right to terminate a relationship with any doctor at any time unless you are a danger to yourself and others. Even the schitzophrenic patients we see at my doctor’s office still have freedoms. We have a guy who wears jewelry made of copper, plastic and duct tape, sees choirs of angels in his living room, talks to God in public, pees in his sink for fear that the Martians who control the Russian Mafia have placed electrodes in his toilet to corrode his brain through his penis and never bathes. He lives in assisted care but is not dangerous so he can come and go at will. He walks to our office, smells terrible and keeps the appointments necessary to his health. At any time he could fire my doctor as long as he found another one and took care of his health issues.
We all have so much more freedom and in most cases so many less issues than this guy. In most places, there are public mental health clinics, support groups and schools for psychiatry with sliding scale fees. I encourage any Otherkin who suspect that they might have a mental health issue to look into and utilize all the resources at our disposal to improve the public image of Otherkin.
Well, the first NoVA Otherkin Meetup outside of Sticks and Stones went very well. We had a total of 7 people attend, including myself. We met for just under two hours, and a lot of fun and good food and good conversation was had. I’d like to see about getting some more people there next time, and possibly going a bit longer, but I do like the group we had. Though I might have to sit on the side of the table that’s doing magical geekery next time rather than the side that’s doing exotic jewelry design. ;-)
The next meetup will be Sunday, October 1st, at 6pm. Same location.
Just reminding folks, the Northern Virginia Otherkin Meetup is meeting today, Labor Day, at 6pm at the Silver Diner on Gallows Road by the Dunn Loring metro station. If you don’t already know what I look like to find us at our table, a recent photo is here: http://anotherwiki.dreamhart.org/wiki/Jarandhel_Dreamsinger
Ok, here’s the scoop - I’ve decided to dive in head first with this and try to hold the first meetup next Monday, Labor Day, at 6pm at the Silver Diner near the Dunn Loring/Merrifield Metro Station in Vienna.
I’m not sure how many folks we’ll get to this first one, especially with the short notice, but better to get the ball rolling than to never begin. ;-)
Just found out there’s a new meetup in Delaware, Ohio, starting on September 13th:
Thought folks might be interested.
As I am sure most of you have guessed, I was a member of House Eclipse. I was one of the original founding 6 to be precise. I miss the gatherings we had if not the egotistical crap that results when you throw a bunch of Otherkin in a room at the same time. The running joke is that a nightclub that can fit 500 people is really only big enough for two vampires and their egoes, and even then it is still crowded.
I left the community after I got sick of the drama. Also I got sick of how we few founders of House Eclipse required voting members to attend only 1 meeting a year, and we hounded people for months beforehand about a simple dinner meeting. Still it was only the few core members who showed with perhaps an average of 1 to 3 other people of the 20 or so voting full members.
Our rules were simple. A voting member could be any kintype or none at all. Our nonkin members had the same voting rights as the Otherkin. Nonkin also kept us from forgetting that our Kin lives were only half the spectrum. The other side is fitting in and being a contributing and functional member of society to whatever extent we could. Our Nonkin were there to smack our egoes back down to size and tell us when we were being stupid, obnoxious or impractical. Nonkin also included donors, who would tell us vampires when we were letting our cold, animalistic side out too far in public due to needing to feed.
Contributing to society could take many forms. For us it meant either being in college or a student and paying rent/doing household chores to pay rent, having your own place to live, having a job of some kind if not a full time student and taking care of everyday and financial responsibilities. It also included philisophically the everlasting fight for self control, self knowledge and understanding of both sides of the self.
We made allowances for members with mental and physical illnesses. The rule was that for either, you had to be receiving some kind of professional care, even if it was at a public health clinic. All of us Sangs willingly got blood tests every 6 months (I still do) along with the donors, which I still also insist on for said donors. Those like me with a mental illness like clinical depression had to go to our psychiatrist and take our prescribed medicines. If those medicines caused ill effects, we knew better than to try and just stop taking them, we talked to our doctors and had them do their jobs.
When a tantric and energy donor exposed several people to herpes, she was banned and everyone who had direct or indirect contact with her all got tested and willingly were abstinent from sex or feeding for two months until we were in the all clear. When we found out that one of our male members was bipolar and had a statutory rape charge, we banned him from interacting with any of the kids who came to House functions and assigned him a chaperone at any gathering the House attended where there were kids or teens. He was hurt, but understood the necessity. We also required him to continue counseling or be expelled when he had thought of quitting that.
Children were welcome at our open events like camping trips with an adult relative accompanying them and if said adult was at least a probationary member. This was especially important after I attended another group’s gather where someone brought an 18 year old nonkin to the gathering without telling her what kind of people were there. The same person then proceeded to get her drunk and naked in a hot tub to try to have sex with her. The organizer of that gathering did not intercede, stating that it was none of their business. I was at that gathering and as I at the time felt that it was not my place to interfere with another person’s event, I and the other House Eclipse attendee did nothing. When we got home and discussed the event with the House, I wrote a formal, public apology for not interfering and pointing out that the action was illegal and immoral. Should I ever see something again like this, I will stop it from occurring, even if I am overstepping my bounds. Vampires are territorial but we are also bound by laws and must obey them.
I also feel now that being too permissive of bad behavior encourages it. Certainly I believe in accepting the differences of others, but I also believe in pointing out dangerous or foolish behaviors. If I had snot hanging from my nose in public, I would expect a real friend to point it out and hand me a tissue. If I need to feed and am acting like an asshole because of it, my donors and friends point that out. If a therian friend sniffs me in private, that is no big deal, but if they growl at someone on the bus in public I will let them know that that is inappropriate behavior.
I mentioned the wolf Therian before who ate raw meat at a diner (and got tapeworms and other issues from it) and who snapped at a waitress. He was immediately asked to leave that event and spoken to by everyone about what was and was not appropriate behavior in public. When we went camping in the hills later, he asked permission to go howl loudly, and we gave it. He had fun and started to learn what was and was not socially acceptable. Similarly a dark Fae member of our group enjoyed verbally pushing people’s buttons to see how angry he could make them. He was banned from our events.
Also banned was a psychic vampire with no control. She had no training so we were patient at first, teaching the basics in grounding, centering and shielding to her and letting her know in no uncertain terms that our gatherings were NOT a free energy buffet and to stop feeding, now. She made all sorts of excuses about why she did not have time to learn to control herself or meditate and how she didn’t have time to actually read up on the research homework we assigned her (basic books on energy, shielding and psionics). So before the next meeting, we shielded ourselves psychically, cleansed the area with smoke and salt water and put a protection talisman out. She took two steps in, looked angry and walked out, never to return. Good riddance.
If anyone is seriously looking for book resources I will be happy to post a recommended reading list on several topics.
Just to be clear, while itzocelotl is my roommate and is paying me to be the webmaster of House Eclipse’s website, I am not myself a member. I do agree with them on many points. I’m simply gun-shy about joining otherkin organizations due to past experiences.
bloodyvampire-83 replied to your post: My whole body aches. What the fuck. Why do I have…If you lived around my town [doubt it] I would be a donor. I would not mind at all helping a vampire, especially after not having blood for months!
That’s very sweet of you. I live in New England, though, so you’re probably across the country. There’s basically about four people within roughly three thousand miles in any given direction.
Alright, that’s an exaggeration. I live in a town of two thousand, but that’s basically two or three people. Everyone else is an asshole or is so braindead I just sort of want to kill them.
I don’t know if you know about this list already, but have you checked out the New England Vamps yahoogroup? There are 99 members and there look to be at least some recent posts, though the last time it was really active was 2007. There might still be some folks from it around in the New England area, though, or they might know where to find others.
Also, the otherkin and therian communities up there might be good places to find donors - usually we’re familiar enough with the vamp community to understand your needs. There are a few groups I know of:
Tristate Otherkin (Despite the url, includes Connecticut)